Melanie Shmois

View Original

Fear is outdated

“Avoiding danger is no safe in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold”-Helen Keller

For millions of years, fear was arguably our most important emotion. Our survival depended on it. When faced with a life -threatening danger like a saber-toothed tiger, or grizzly bear, our brain triggered this powerful emotion in the form of our fight or flight response to protect us. Because of this, we ran for cover and learned how to protect ourselves from these dangers and learned how to live amongst them and keep ourselves safe.

We have now evolved to the point that most of our modern-day fears are irrational and have us running for cover even though we are safe. These new fears are self-created and hold us back from obtaining our goals and dreams.

Instead of a saber-toothed tiger, we instead fear embarrassing ourselves during a presentation at work or on a FB/IG Live. We fret over getting rejected on a sales call or not hitting our weight loss goals.  

Fear is mostly outdated my friends! Fear comes from our most primitive part of our brain and stimulates that fight or flight response. However, we still possess this powerful emotion because physical threats still exist, but for many of us, we attach to it and respond to it even though we are physically safe. It is important to see the difference.

Fear is the anticipation of pain, yet emotional pain is not something to run away from. You can feel embarrassed, rejected, and fail and still be okay. These negative emotions will not kill you. In fact, being willing to feel all of these feelings will get you closer to your goals. 

The most successful people open themselves up to these negative emotions because they know it will not physically hurt them and will, instead, bring them closer to what they desire. 

Feel the fear and do it anyway!

Imagine what you might be willing to do if you are willing to experience any emotion? Imagine what you might do if you did not care what others might think about you? Imagine if you were willing to feel the fear and move forward anyway?

The worst that can happen in these situations is an emotion. All emotions come from thoughts in your own mind, so they are all self-created. You can FEEL any emotion that comes your way, even fear itself. The next time you feel afraid, ask yourself what you are really afraid of?  If it is not a physical threat then remind yourself that you can in fact feel whatever negative feeling you are fearing. 

The silly thing is that many of us will feel the feeling we anticipate feeling and not do the thing we really want to do that will move us forward. Instead of opening ourselves up to possible embarrassment, we feel embarrassed ahead of time and don’t do it. This avoidance holds us back ,and we end up feeling ashamed or embarrassed anyway. 

My coach reminded me that hiding doesn’t feel good either, and when we are hiding, it doesn’t feel safe. We are often trembling in fear when we are under cover.

If you are physically safe, then fear is not a good reason not to do something.Whatever you are afraid of, remind yourself that feeling fear is no big deal. It is self-created, and you are equipped to feel any feeling that comes your way. Feel the fear and do it anyway.

If fear is holding you back, schedule a coaching call with me so I can teach you how to overcome it in order for you to achieve your goals and dreams!

Schedule Now: https://mindyourstrengthcoaching.as.me/