How We Pretend To Feel Alive

On a coaching call today, my coach was sharing how silly it is to look for ways to feel "alive" and "on the edge" when life offers us so many opportunities for that all on its own!

We sign up for the Tough Mudder.

We jump out of a plane.

We take the 90-minute hot yoga class.

We diet.

We cold plunge.

We consider having an affair.

We stay in unhealthy relationship cycles because it makes us feel special.

 Why do we do these things?

Because of the feelings it delivers, of course!

The feelings we get from these concocted experiences are not all bad. They are exciting, riveting even.

We want the full breadth of the human spectrum of emotions, and we want it NOW.

Strangely, however, when life offers us things like -

+ sorrow & grief

+ risk & fear

+ love & vulnerability

+ power & boundary setting

we often shrink.

We numb ourselves by saying, "Not now" and "No, thank you."

We'll start the business next year.

We'll end the relationship someday.

We'll set the boundaries when it gets worse.

We avoid, deny, and adjust our lives to ensure we never feel the true discomfort of these emotions, and we think we will be overwhelmed with feelings should we go there.

However, this leaves us very comfy, and humans are not made for comfort.

We get bored!

So we manufacture excitement with a trip to Italy and too many glasses of wine with our friends.

We look for "living" in over-spending, over-eating, restricting, gossiping, or some other buffer.

Now, stay with me on this -

What IF we just let life hit us and responded by being with it all exactly as it is?

We felt the feelings.

We had the hard conversations.

We went after the dream.

We left the dynamic that's holding us back.

What would happen?

What if we stayed IN life instead of avoiding it and making up a way to feel alive?